Surviving the Storm...

I am a lucky one!

I went to hell – and I came back to my heaven! 

Scientology is a heaven!

I got into a situation in an org and I became disaffected, then I KR’d it. And as I live in another country and far from any org, I began to communicate with other people who also were disaffected. I went into group agreement instead of just waiting for (and seeing) the answer from my KR, which came later…but I was already going into lower and lower conditions with my religion.

I did not say much to my Scientologist friends of what I was doing. I believed I was doing the correct thing: helping LRH to get rid of false tech. And I was a “brave thetan,” willing to get declared because I thought I was finding the truth that no other Scientologist had seen before… 

I never realized that what was happening is that I was very cleverly withdrawing from my own life, my own family, my friends and my whole life in Scientology. 

I almost lost my family – who are Scientologists in good standing. And I felt we were betrayed by the ones I believed were my own friends. I felt sad, lonely and had cut communication because I did not want to enturbulate the ones who did not know anything, as now I had a “truth” which not everybody dared to see. 

And my life started to be miserable. My kids wondered about me, and our future in Scientology – what was going to happen to them? Will they be audited? Will they be able to move up The Bridge? What is going to happen with my best friends in Scientology? I loved them too much, they were too good… I did not sleep well… 

Then one day a friend called me and he asked me what was going on with me. He was moving up The Bridge at Flag. And I was not going to be the one to tell him all my new findings… 

He told me I will not hang up the phone until you tell me what is happening and if you don’t tell me I will come to your country, to your home, grab you by the hair and bring you to the MAA so you sort out this situation fast. He 8-Ced the cycle. He got in comm with the Ship’s MAA, who happened to be in LA. I was soon flying to Los Angeles – to do what exactly, I did not know – as I already had made a decision: that I was not going to open eyes which I believed were already shut. 

How wrong I was, how miserable I felt after one day of talking to a Sea Org terminal, when she told me she had been in Scientology for over 50 years. She said those guys, whom I had believed, were so out-ethics that they are trying to destroy Scientology. She said they will never be successful in doing this but that was their actual intention. Then I read all the truth about all of them, and I realized they were not innocent, as they made me believe. They were so guilty. They were so evil. They had no products – just natter, natter, natter and more natter… 

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